Winner of beauty contests is JOY HARRIS, and an unrivalled joy to behold in her bikini.
We'd have photographed her in it if she'd had it with her.
What happened to it, then?
Well, it was like this. Joy hung it out to dry and a wind blew up and carried it away, both top and bottom. It landed at the feet of a young man emerging from a chemist's shop with headache pills. He'd had a headache ever since his last disagreement with his girlfriend Rosie. Rosie had used a croquet mallet. He thought the bikini was a gift from the gods and that Rosie would be enchanted with it. But it was an itsy-bitsy bikini and Rosie was by no means an itsy-bitsy girl, and all the time she was in it she kept falling out of it. It was ever so embarrassing.
To stay in it and to look unrivalled, a girl needs the same vitalistics as Joy. 36-23-36.