Joyce Matlock

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Time To Spare

Housewives don't have much time to spare, especially those who, like JOYCE MATLOCK, hold down an office job as well.

But if you're as efficient as Joyce, there's always time to spare, time to wander around the Worcestershire countryside and take in all the relaxing quiet of undisturbed rurality.

And time, too, to pose for her photographer, who's never too busy himself to miss capturing her image for posterity.

Joyce is twenty-four, loves dancing and thinks we could do away with national crises if we sent all the politicians on package tours.

On some package tours these days it's difficult to get back.

Marie Auge

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Rest Assured

You probably think as you take a shuftie at MARIE AUGE that she doesn't really look as corking as this. You probably think she’s been specially dolled-up to give the cameraman lovely hallucinations.

You may rest assured that Marie really is as luscious as she looks, and she has by no means been specially dolled-up in order to project a sex appeal she doesn’t normally possess.

On the contrary. She is a real Parisian whizzbang of a girl, who raises hoarse cries of “Mother, I want to leave home,” from all kinds of maternally-afflicted bachelors whenever she passes by.

Marie is studying Oriental languages in Paris and helping to pay for her studies by modelling and doing other well-paid jobs in her spare time. Other well-paid jobs include writing letters home to China for Chinese exiles who can hardly write at all.

An incidental fact is that men irreconcilably smitten by Marie feel as if they’ve galloped into a brick wall. It really does hurt as much as that.

Marilyn Ward

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See the Manageress

If you like shopping with your girlfriend, particularly when she’s after a bargain in a boutique, you can get very good service in the boutique run by MARILYN WARD.

Ask for the manageress and Marilyn will appear. You’ll be so captivated that five minutes later your girlfriend will slosh you and say, “In case you’ve forgotten, Romeo, you’re with me.”

Susan Whiddon

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Plymouth Is The Place

Plymouth is where SUSAN WHIDDON resides, so Plymouth is the place for any feller who wants to play the part of a devoted fan and pop flowers into her letterbox once a week.

Susan and her hubby came down from the North to live in Plymouth, and the place perked up no end when she arrived. It’s a fair and attractive city in any case. It's even better looking now.

Susan likes reading, dancing and sunning herself in her bikini. Her husband likes Susan. What a sound and sensible feller.

Kim Scott

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Flying Tonight ?

Joe Binglewood is so lucky he ought to be prohibited. He was coming out of the shop eating his fish and chips when he stepped on the foot of a tall picturesque dolly who was in the ravishing category.

Which is to say she was all long legs and curves. Joe was full of chips and it took him six swallows before he could start apologising.

"It's quite all right," said KIM SCOTT, "it's only my foot and I'm sure the numbness will have gone by next week"

Joe had never trodden on the foot of such a lovely bird as Kim, which just shows how lucky he really is. Kim is an air stewardess with the most vibrant personality. It sort of makes you quiver, unless you go in for bicycles and your mother won't let you meet girls. In which case the pleasure of flying tonight with a girl like Kim and having her top up your coffee cup, is something you ought to talk seriously about to your mum.

Kim is our idea of how to fly from London to Pompala in transported fragility. The more you see of her the weaker you get.

Where's Pompala, by the way?

Who cares?

Britt Hampshire

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She Forgot Her Gloves

It was like the man next door who left his house to catch his train to work. He looked absolutely dapper, as he always did, in his single-breasted, narrow-lapelled charcoal grey suit, complete with buttonhole. But he was still wearing his carpet slippers and when he reached the station the only thing the friendly porter could do was to lend him a pair of railway boots.

The day was a ridiculous one for him, he spent it noisily clumping round the office, making the typists quiver and inciting the boss to send out orders demanding the removal of some road-breaking machine that had been smuggled into the building.

Well, it didn’t get as ridiculous as that for BRITT HAMPSHIRE. She only forgot her gloves. She had everything else needed to make a girl look well-dressed and glamorous and gloves hardly mattered. It was just that a finishing touch, like neat gloves or cute hat, completes a girl’s look to her own satisfaction.

Sometimes when a girl feels gloves are a must, such as on the occasion of being a guest at a well-dressed wedding, and she finds she’s either forgotten them or misplaced them, the event is absolutely ruined for her.

She feels quite undressed.

Angelika Fakelberg

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Intense Time

West German student ANGELIKA FAKELBERG is having a very intense time at the moment, swotting for nothing but exams.

It's all reference books and brain work.

You wouldn't think, would you, that anyone as pretty as Angelika would need to worry about brains, but the world being what it is a girl these days needs them as she's never needed them before.

That's what comes of equality and having to show men you're as good as they are. It's not enough now to have intuition and the beguiling aptitude for making men go on their knees when they offer diamond bracelets, you've got to beat them to their knees in other ways.

It’s getting awful

Sheridan Wells

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Every Little Helps

It was a lovely wedding and the bride looked sumptuous. The honeymoon was memorable, of course, and then SHERIDAN WELLS settled down to looking after her home and her man.

But what with the cost of living rocketing at week-ends, Sheridan found the budget hardly allowed for a Sunday joint. So, she went out and did some modelling in her spare time.

"Thanks," she said when the agency paid her, "every little helps.”

"That's not little," said the agency, counting it out again.

"That's what you think,' said Sheridan, "haven't you seen the price of tomatoes?"

"We're off tomatoes, they give us the pip."

Sara Wolfe

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Where Will All The Dollies Go ?

If the sixties are remembered for anything, it'll be for the emergence of the mini-skirted dollies.

Girls have always played a characteristically confusing part in the lives of boys. Boys find no complications up to the age of about 15. Up to that age the girls are around but the boys ignore them.

This makes the girls furious. So, when the boys reach 16 and upwards, when they then become aware there's something corkingly fascinating about girls, the girls pay them out by making life so confusing and complicated for them that life is never quite the same again for the muscular sex.

The emergence of the mini-skirted dollies really put the lid on the traumatic effects. Many a boy just reeled about mumbling, "Oh, my grandmother, I can't even put my head out of the window without losing my eyesight."

SARA WOLFE is a brilliant example of a London dolly making life chronically traumatic for highly susceptible boys. She works in an advertising agency. She wears the loveliest minis.

But now that the midi and the maxi are gradually taking over, where will all our dishy dollies go to? Girls in midis or maxis aren't dollies anymore, they're just followers of undolly fashion. Perhaps the boys won't get such eyestrain, but oh, woe.

It goes without saying that Sara in a maxi would be a different girl. You'd never see her legs and young boys would wonder if she'd got any.

Heather Brown

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Heather For Luck

There's a saying that if you wear a sprig of heather it will bring you luck. If you wear a sprig of Scottish heather, it's said you'll never have the misfortune to fall into Loch Ness and be eaten by the monster.

Now then. HEATHER BROWN was on holiday in Scotland and she and her boyfriend were out in a boat. He was wearing a sprig of local heather. He fell in. Heather rescued him. "There you are," he panted wetly, "what luck, it didn't eat me."

"It wasn't there," said Heather, "this is Loch Lomond."

"Never mind," he said, "you're my best bit of real luck, if you hadn't been around you couldn't have pulled me out."

Heather giggled.

Camellia Tiran

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Remember That Persian Garden ?

Perhaps you've never been to Persia. They call it Iran now, but it's the same place.

The poets and the songwriters used to write lovely things about Persian gardens. Well, here's a ravishing bloom straight out of a Persian garden. CAMELLIA TIRAN. She's been in England for quite a few years and at eighteen she's still blooming.

Camellia makes dresses and gives them all a touch of Persian enchantment, and if you know any nice concubines tell them they'll look exquisite in anything Camellia turns out. There's nothing like a bit of the old Persian enchantment to add lustre to a saucy Fatima.

Christine Norton

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Lovely Learner

When we were young we thought we knew it all. We thought, as every generation thinks, that we were the ones who’d discovered sex. We forgot that when Shakespeare was young his generation discovered it too.

Not concerned with any burning questions which don’t concern her academic pursuits, CHRISTINE NORTON is a student whose spare time is fully taken up with intensive studying.

Now and again she does break out, however, such as when she entered the Miss Enfield beauty contest and delightedly found herself a finalist.

Other than that it’s pen and pencil-biting sessions over books and logarithms and what were the economic reasons that led to the French Revolution and why Lincoln was so passionate at Gettysburg.

It’s a lot to cram into the mind of any lovely learner when there is so much gay living going on elsewhere. Christine admits she sometimes wants to drop everything and go down to the river for a trip in a canoe. But if she wants to qualify as a linguistic secretary or as a junior executive on a woman’s magazine, she’s got to forget canoes and things.

LuLu

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Yoo-Hoo, Lulu

They ran the Derby at Epsom not so long ago and everyone got quite worked up. The runners went so fast that the only way of finding out how many were in the race was to count the legs and divide by four.

 One of the Epsom visitors was international singing star LULU.

 The cameramen caught her on the rail in her K.O. hot pants. Lulu just projected a lovely smile and they all said, "Good on you. Lulu, you're even more photogenic than the gee-gees."

 "I bet you say that to all the girls," said Lulu.

Marie Auge

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Break for a Soufflé

When one is not only studying Chinese in a Paris university but also working hard in one’s spare time to earn one’s university fees, one needs the occasional break.

MARIE AUGE may not be able to afford a five-course lunch, even though there’s nothing that would give you greater joy than buying her one, but she has to eat.

During university recesses Marie works as a manicurist. At lunchtime break she likes a soufflé.

At a Chinese restaurant she knows in Paris they serve the most aromatic and fluffy soufflés. She orders in Chinese. It helps her with her homework. It seems a terrible waste dedicating oneself to Chinese, because there’s not much call for it except in China. Where’s China? Oh, sorry, Chairman Mao.

Ann Mountford

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Glorious Devon

Devon is a county renowned for being glorious. Lovely golf courses, green farms and sea-washed beaches. Drake used to sail out from Devon. Not long-ago ANN MOUNTFORD sailed out herself and came to London.

Now, instead of gathering hay on farms in Devon she's a ledger clerk in the City. Some might think this isn't a change for the better, but Ann likes London and she likes her work.

She's good at figures.

And she's got rich auburn hair, lovely green eyes and long legs. She's nineteen. It's her world.