Mystery Model
/Relax No 13 - 1967
Gold Star Publications 1967
Nina Swallow
/The End In sight
It had to come, of course.
What did?
The mini to end all other minis. They can go just so high and then it’s the end. When NINA SWALLOW found out just how mini her latest creation was, she couldn't go out in it until her stretch tights were dry. She'd just washed them. She didn't fancy going to the classical concert in her nylons, it would have distracted eyes from the conductor.
Nina is absolutely sold on classical music, and she's a lover of the theatre too, so if you want to keep her absorbed in a lengthy conversation it's no good keeping to subjects like detergents and Derby winners, you won't get past the first five minutes without looking up and finding Nina gone.
Gone where?
Gone to find someone more intelligent.
Louise Grayson
/Life Is What You Make It
Women appear on TV and are heard on radio complaining that it's a man's world. “Why,” they ask, “can't we drive dustcarts, collect garbage, mine coal, man the fishing trawlers, look after lighthouses and be bricklayers? Why must men hog all these lovely jobs, the swine’s?” Dunno. Men are like that, the swine’s.
But LOUISE GRAYSON is a happy enough housewife. Life, to Louise, is what you make it. If you want to make it a life of complaining, that's up to you, but you won’t get much out of it.
“Anyone,” says Louise, “can sit at home and wish herself surf-riding in Honolulu" says Louise,
Honolulu is lovely for surf-riding, of course, but who wants all that water and no green parks?"
Sara Stuart
/Shirts, Sweaters and Boots
When it comes to showing off the latest line in what the model girl is wearing today, fashion model SARA STUART is considerably with it. This is undoubtedly due to the fact that Sara is rather delightful to look at herself, and a shirt or a sweater or a pair of boots can almost be said to do no more than gild the lily.
And when nylons have to be modelled, who has a lovelier leg than Sara? Sara, by the way, is eighteen, spans the tape measure at 36"-22"-35". loves horses and winter sports, and is a classically beautiful Scot.
Jacqueline Blair
/The Question Is
With so many facets to fashion, the question is should a girl go for boots or frills or Long Johns?
Secretary JACQUELINE BLAIR thought it might solve something if she went for all three but found out immediately that Long Johns simply don't go with a mini.
Boots go with a mini and so does a straw hat on a sunny day, and frills go with anything. But Long Johns are for warmth and comfort, not for viewing, So Jackie bought a maxi and everything was as it should be. Except that the maxi hid the boots and frills as well and she had to acquire the cutest straw hat she could find and wait for a sunny day.
Elizabeth Gallacher
/Bikini Line
On our last visit to the South of France the fashion writers were telling us the bikini was out and the new line was a one-piece. But the fashion writers were up the wall. The bikini was still in. You weren't surprised and neither were we, for when you consider how the line makes curvy ELIZABETH GALLACHER look even more curvy, who wants her to wear a one-piece?
Renate Dittmann
/Favourite Fraulein
"Some of my best friends are Germans," said the man in the Piccadilly bar. "Oh? Why?" asked the second man whose name was Smith.
"I come from Munich,” said the first man.
"I tell you what," said Smith, eyeing a svelte redhead who'd just come in with a virile-looking guitar-player, "I'd like my best friend to come from West Berlin.”
"Please explain more," said the man from Munich, "I am most interested, although it is not in West Berlin where you will find the most happy Germans, but in Munich. I am from Munich.”
"And very nice too, " said Smith sort of non-commit tally. "But I'm not thinking of someone like you. It's been a pleasure meeting you, but l've got a different shape in mind. It's a girl.
"Ah," said the man from Munich.
"She's my favourite fraulein," said Smith, "and her name is RENATE DITTMANN and she doesn't half make my tonsils twitch. Talk about sex appeal. I certainly couldn't wish for a best friend better than her. We could have some marvellous outings to museums. How are you on museums?"
"I am fine. How are you on German beer?"
"Well, if you insist,” said Smith, "I’II have another lager and a hot frank-furter.”
Gina Dawson
/Same Girl
Perhaps GINA DAWSON doesn't look the same girl in her bikini as she does in her wig, but there's no basic difference. She looks gorgeous all the time, no matter what she's wearing, which is why she's been crowned as a beauty queen. We daresay you'd like it if the girl next door looked like Gina, but you've got your prize geraniums and your giant delphiniums, so what more do you want, greedy?
Pauline Gorvin
/The Perils of Pauline
Ah, yes, there was this villainous miscreant who tied Emily Engadine to the railway line. Emily, the beautiful counter-intelligence agent, is actually none other than PAULINE GORVIN, a lovely Hampshire girl.
Well, some awfully decent bloke rescued her, Pauline dashed off, jumped into her red sports car, and roared off in pursuit of a devilish plot hatched by some unshaven burks who had it in for the Royal Navy. On the road Pauline picked up a dashing captain, they stopped at a roadhouse for a quick steak medium-rare and a bottle of champagne. They stayed for coffee and had a lovely evening, and as for the unshaven burks, they got jammed up in a level crossing and the Royal Navy sailed at dawn, after all.
Gina Scott
/Model See
We don't know her boss, but we do know that in GINA SCOTT he has a model secretary. Gina is as efficient at her job as a joy to the eye, and Gina is very much a joy to the eye.
Gina's vitalistics are 36"-22”-36", she's nineteen and swimming is her favourite sport and parties her favourite recreation.
Jacqueline Blair
/Houseproud
It's not that JACOUELINE BLAIR has been strictly trained in the matter of polishing and dusting. It's just that when mother went out to do the weekend shopping she said to Jackie, "Do my housework while I'm out, darling, and you can borrow the car tomorrow."
Jackie doesn't mind being the victim of bribery when the end product is as high on her list as that, so she didn't waste time getting into an argument, she just grabbed mop, duster, cleaner and broom.
Naturally, if a girl can sit around and manage a mop at the same time, why not? There's always the easier way of doing a domestic chore. As long as the results satisfy houseproud mum, it hardly matters.
Joan Russell
/And When The Sun Came Out
Who should come out with it but JOAN RUSSELL.
She couldn't come out when it was raining because she wasn't dressed for it. Well, there was a fairy at the bottom of her garden in the Scottish Lowlands, you see, and this fairy was dressed in gossamer white with dainty wings. Joan wanted to get to know her better and the fairy, whose name was Louella, said she could only co-operate if she dressed as a fairy herself. Then they could flit around together and get quite chummy.
So as soon as the sun came out and conditions were right Joan danced into the light and flitted about and made fairy cooing noises. But there was no Louella. She'd forgotten. She'd gone off to have a cream and cheese tea with the fairy queen.
The trouble is that fairies today aren't as reliable as they used to be. They flit off just like that. Joan never did get to know Louella, though she'd set her heart on being fitted for a pair of wings. Life is full of disappointments.
Nicole Shelby
/Knightsbridge Texan
Texans don't often leave Texas, you know, because who wants to? What can they offer anywhere else that they haven't got in Texas and more of?
You heard about Joe Pongo, of course. He was an exception. He set off on his horse one day to ride to the border and spend a couple of years in Mexico City where he intended to carve Indian figures out of wood. Six weeks later he found he was still in Texas. He rode on. And on. In the end he realised the place was just too big, and they hadn't invented planes, so he stayed put and devoted himself to making boots for the American Cavalry.
Then, a lot more recently, a different kind of Texan called NICOLE SHELBY decided there must be other places in the world. As Texas was so big, she thought it would be a change to go to somewhere little. So, she came to Britain.
She was tickled. It couldn't be helped; the whole place was crowded with people. She'd never been tickled in Texas, there's a square mile of elbow room for everyone.
Anyway, Nicole got a work permit, bought herself some scintillating mini-dresses and let London see what a glamorous Texan really looked like. London took a deep breath and surrendered. And Nicole took a flat in Knightsbridge.
Since then, you've seen Nicole in any amount of TV series, and if you've ever wondered where she got those long, lovely legs from, well now you know, she got them from Texas.
June Gordon
/We're Off
Before we were indescribably smitten by a fair maid from afar, we were thinking of settling down before our winter fireside in a state of soporific hibernation.
Then we saw JUNE GORDON. She was just going home to Scotland. So, we cancelled the order for winter fuel and gave up all idea of hibernating. A rush of vibrant corpuscles to the head had sent us all agog and it was like Spring in the park again.
In other words, we're off.
We're either off to Scotland or off our head.
June is a secretary and the girl we'd most like to be lost in the typing pool with. What grace, what charm, what fair elegance.
As the coalman said when a hundredweight sack fell on his head, "I've gone all fragile.' It's a feeling of being far, far away.
Ruth Cavendish
/Caught On The Cover
You were bound to have noticed your favourite figure catching your eye on this month's cover. It's the girl you're always wanting to see more of RUTH CAVENDISH and if you don't think she's even lovelier than ever, it must be because you're going steady with a beautiful blonde, you traitor.