Judie Jayson

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Frilly Feeling

There's such a minimum amount of lingerie worn by girls these days that lots of manufacturers who are in it for the money are getting worried almost to death. The lot of a pauper is not a happy one in any era.

There's а great yearning among the lingerie-makers for the days when a girl wasn't ready to slip her dress on unless she was wearing at least six petticoats. In Grandpa Bertie's family album there's a sepia-tinted picture of Grandma Emma riding a penny-farthing at Eastbourne, and in the pic Grandma Emma looks a riot of billowing lace. It must have cost Grandpa Bertie a fortune to fit her out, especially when they were at Eastbourne.

Anyway, the frilly feeling is something the girls will want to experience again at some time in the future. Here's JUDIE JAYSON looking abundantly frilly and if she makes some of you come all over nostalgic you must be well past twenty and a Beatles fan.

Whatever happened to that lot?

Span No 207 - November 1971

Maggie McCully

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Here She Is Then

We've been asked so often for a feature on MAGGIE McCULLY that in the end we really went digging for photographs of this photogenic delight.

It was what they call a successful dig.

For new readers who expressed so much interest in her, this is our Maggie. She's a secretary and a lover of summer holidays in hot sunshine. She's dark, brown-eyed and beautiful.

And she loves modern beat, good films, historical novels and the view of Hampstead Heath on a spring morning.

Don't get too infatuated, Ernest, it won't do you any good. Just admire her from afar and stick to the girl in the grocery shop. That way you could get extra sugar.

Span No 207 - November 1971

Cheri Scott

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Why Men Leave Home

Some market researcher asked CHERI SCOTT the question. It was all to do with something neurotic.

"Well," said Cheri, an outspoken Scot, "it's my opinion that men leave home to go to work, to attend a football match, to chase the milkman, to go for a pint or to post a letter. After that they either get back home on time or they get back late, and if they get back late, they get thumped, and if you keep standing in my way and make me late you'll get thumped too."

That's what they call very succinct.

Spick and Span Extra No 52 - Autumn 1974

Marta Cubisova

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Downtown Dolly

Happily, resident in the downtown fringes of London is MARTA CUBISOVA, looking every inch a swinger.

Actually, Marta is from Prague.

A Czechoslovakian actress, she decided to get out from behind the Iron Curtain and come to Britain.

"Welcome indeed," said the man from the ministry. He was the one in charge of looking over refugees. He had the most trying job to keep it all informal as he was dying to invite Marta out to dinner. Ministry men aren't all computerised subtracting machines.

Marta was enchanted with her welcome and as it wasn't long before the London photographers were queueing up to photo- graph her, everything became quite lovely.

It couldn't have happened to a nicer girl.

Spick No 204 - November 1970

Carmen Dene

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The Shape

Since entering show biz, CARMEN DENE has become known as the shape men would most like to be seen out with as long as the wife is in Honolulu.

Carmen has the most exquisite curves and is living, breathing proof that girls are a lot better to look at than men.

"Not at all," said Carmen, "I wouldn't want to look at girls if there were some different shapes around, like men for instance. You must have a funny idea of what we find appealing if you think we simply adore looking at each other."

We were thinking of what we liked looking at.

"Well, spare a thought for us girls sometimes," said Carmen.

Span No 212 - April 1972

Marie Reynolds

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The Reason Why

The mini is dead, so they say, but it won't lie down.

Why won't it?

Here's the reason why.

A girl called MARIE REYNOLDS.

For when Marie and a mini fit each other as well as this, who could ask for more? Who wants to ask for more?

As the traffic warden said when Marie alighted from her car, "Park here as long as you like, miss, and if I have to book you it'll hurt me all the way home."

"Watch it, cheeky," said Marie.

"I am," said the traffic warden," and it fits you a treat, miss. What a mini."

Marie Graham

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Very Vital is Housewife Marie Graham

Very vital is housewife MARIE GRAHAM. She belongs to a keep-fit class, a tennis club, a boomerang learners' cycle-

Hold on, wait a moment, what's a boomerang learners' cycle?

You know about Australia, don't you, thickhead?

Yeh, and about boomerangs, but I don't know about boomerang learners.

In that case, shut up, yes, and not only is Marie learning how to hurl a boomerang and dodge it on the way back, but she's also doing car maintenance and athletics.

Ye gods, that's enough, I'm all-over racked nerves.

So, you should be at your age.

Spick & Span Extra No 52 - Autumn 1974

Caron Townsend

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Nuts Can Do Wonders

One gorilla met another gorilla.

There was the sound of the most awful thudding crunch. But gorillas being what they are they didn't even notice, they just grinned at each other.

One said to the other, "You're looking well, Hairy, apart from your teeth."

Said the other, "I've found a new kind of nut-look." And he opened his huge great mouth and pointed to the back of his throat, and the first gorilla put his stupid head in and Hairy bit it right off. "I didn't think much of his hair cream, "he said later to his lady gorilla.

Gorillas, of course, do love nuts. Nuts can do wonders for girls as well as gorillas. It's all those proteins. Look at London dolly CARON TOWNSEND. Caron is eighteen and an absolute dish. Peanuts or cashew nuts, Caron can't resist either. That's why she's got a lovely complexion and a curvy figure.

Nuts can do the same for you and make you a stunning 37-23-36.

Not if you're a feller, however.

Span No 207 - November 1971

Gina Barren

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Looking For a Gardener ?

Are you onerously tied to your garden? Like some help, would you? Then look around for someone lovely and horticultural like GINA BARREN. Gina is twenty, she was born in Liverpool and is now a London model.

Her hobby is gardening. Adores it she does. Can't have enough of the old spade and fork. Likes to plant things and watch them grow. Keeps all the flowers looking beautiful. Keeps herself looking tanned and streamlined. 35-23-35. Doesn't wear a bra but ignores Women's Lib. Loves roses and dahlias. Owns long stunning legs. Likes men who can make her laugh as long as they know how to prune plum trees.

Absolutely exotic in a herbaceous border, is Gina.

Marie Graham & Eve Law

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I Can't Come Now

"I can't come now," said MARIE GRAHAM, Hampshire secretary, "I'm all tied up."

"It's only the milkman, anyway," said EVE LAW, ditto, "and he's nobody."

It was all in aid of some amateur dramatics, and Eve was dedicated to making it all look brilliantly authentic. This included getting Marie all tied up and then tickling her foot.

"This is hysterical," said Marie.

"That's right," said Eve, "just shriek your head off kind of lifelike."

Marie thought it was all very well to be kind of lifelike, but there's a point when too much reality turns into how to go bonkers on an overdose of giggling heebie-jeebies.

At which point it's time to suggest a break for coffee

Well, we'll leave it at that and bring you more of the girls next month. Don't get too worked up waiting.

Span No 200 - April 1971

Caroline Adams

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Exhileration

Never mind the crises, which are always with us; anyway. Concentrate on the fact that being alive in this wonderful world of lush pastures is far better than being just a cold, stark stiff in the ground.

Look at CAROLINE ADAMS.

There's exhilaration for you, as well as a saucy wink.

Caroline is all set to look ahead, while glum blokes like Fred are looking back and talking about what it was like when Robin Hood was alive. All merry jostling and jousting in Nottingham and dancing the Maybell with buxom maids.

What's the Maybell?

Well, if you make a hit, it's a real ring-a-ding for a night and a day.

Span No 234 - February 1974

Wanda Liddell

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Chatting Up Wanda

It wasn't going to cost anything except time, and that was going to be very well spent, so up trotted Fred to WANDA LIDDELL, latest pin-up favourite, and began to chat her up.

"I don't suppose you're all that interested in operations," he said, "but at my time of life-

"You don't look a day over eighty," said Wanda, who was spending the afternoon in Hampstead.

"Here, hold on," said Fred, "I'm not seventy yet, and I didn't have the stitches out till yesterday. It's me appendix, lasted me nearly a lifetime, it did, but it had to come out in the end. Gad, I must say you don't half look a treat, darling-

"Now watch it, audacious," said Wanda.

"Anyway, I don't want to bore you," " said Fred, "but l've got to have my arthritis removed tomorrow, and considering I only had me appendix stitches taken out yesterday-"

"Goodbye, you poor old soul," said Wanda.

"Do you have to go?" said Fred.

"Yes," said Wanda, "you are boring me.”

Spick & Span Extra No 52 - Autumn 1974

Jane Walters

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Student Protest

They were getting ever so restive at college, and it looked as if one of them their rackety protests was in the offing.

It was all over student JANE WALTERS.

Someone had said she was leaving, that she'd been offered a glamorous and lucrative career among the exotic hoi pollo of telly commercials.

Several hairy students said they'd fall down dead if Jane left. To keep themselves from thinking too traumatically about this dread fate they began to prepare banners, slogans, and sit-ins.

Then along came Jane, carrying her books and lecture notes. Stepping daintily over students who were going one degree farther than a sit-in with a lie in, she asked what all the fuss was about. When told she was the focal point, like, she giggled and said, "Thanks ever so, fellers, but I'm not leaving, I only do modelling when I'm on vacation."

Joyful relief abounded, and in deep gratitude they all made good resolutions for the New Year. Like taking the fluff out of their beards.

Span No 234 - February 1974

Sandra Morrell

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The Impeccable Look

The phone had been replaced a long time ago, the date for dinner at a lamplit bistro in Chelsea had been fixed and all SANDRA MORRELL had to do was to gild and dress the lily and get there.

She being the lily, of course.

"Hurry up," said her flat mate, "you'll be late.' "Any moment now," said Sandra, "I'II be ready."

Sandra is a girl who can't be hurried under any circs. She likes to be absolutely sure that when she is dated, she looks impeccable. Charlie Greyduck thought that impeccable was something to do with nuts roasted in an iron pan, over an open fire, but dead ignorance keeps Charlie where he is, right at the back.

Anyway, by the time Sandra was ready she did look impeccable and lovely beyond anything. Except that as she came down the stairs her flat mate, Henrietta, said, "Not in that mini, you are silly, you'll have to change it for a maxi. Or put stretch tights on."

"Oh sorry," blushed Sandra, "I forgot."

She shouldn't have worried. Chelsea would have looked and loved. You don't have to be conformist to be impeccable. Not in Chelsea, anyway.

Span No 207 - November 1971