Joanna Young

/

Also A Lovely Cook

Not only is JOANNA YOUNG an attractive housewife and a mother of four little girls, she's also an enthusiastic water-skier.

And that's not all.

She's also a lovely cook.

How do you do it, Joanna?

"Well, you take a bag of flour, a dozen eggs-" No, don't be comical. How do you find the time and the enthusiasm?

"Well, my husband has this big whip, you see-"

No, be serious.

"It just comes naturally. was born a genius." You were born beautiful, that's what. Good on you, darling.

"Don't be so familiar."

Can't help it. You're lovely.

In fact, Joanna isn't just lovely, she looks like the spirit of animated feminity when she's out on her favorite country ramble.

Span No 198 - February 1971

Annette French

/

Waiting For Spring

Spring seemed to be late this year to ANNETTE FRENCH.

She wanted to wear something light and flimsy, something she'd bought from her local boutique in Glasgow, something all primrose yellow.

But it was chilly enough to nip even the most insensitive ear, so Annette wore a warm coat and everything. However, it was supposed to be spring, so she gambolled about. She had to, to keep warm.

She may not have been in something light and flimsy, and primrose yellow, but she still looked ever so dishy.

Wait till the summer comes.

Then she'll put on something divinely brief.

Don't get toothache waiting, fellers. Just compose yourselves and dig up the garden.

Spick No 211 - June 1971

Diane Clarke

/

It's No Joke - She Means It

Beauty queen DIANE CLARKE isn't kidding you with her Long Johns. She means it. She likes them. They remind her of the bygone days of the 1920's, her favourite historical era, when the young people first thought up all the mad things to do. Diane is a Middlesex girl and likes to feel warm in winter.

Spick and Span Extra No 35 - Summer 1970

Marita Saunders

/

Winter Sport

They love her in St. Moritz or Zermatt or any of those other places where winter sports are generally adored.

Her name is MARITA SAUNDERS.

Marita is a Croydon girl, with a job in London, and if there's one thing, she likes more than any other it's gliding down the side of a mountain on skis. She's a winter sport of delicious grace, curve, and charm.

Next time we know a photographer who's thinking of gliding down the same mountain at the same time as Marita, we'll get him to snap her in flight, and we only hope he won't end up flat on his back or head-over ski pants in the branch of an Alpine tree for taking his eye off the mountain and fixing it on Marita instead.

It could happen. Marita in a ski suit looks a lovely 38-24-37.

Yoo-hoo.

Spick No 210 - May 1971

Andrea Kaye

/

Happiness

Not for Dorset girl ANDREA KAYE is the dubious value of wanting fame and fortune.

Happiness to Andrea is in the simple things. Her one ambition is to get married to a really nice guy, to become a wife and mother and to let everyone else worry about finding a goldmine.

Andrea enjoys walking, dancing and good books.

She’s vivacious, healthy and deliciously uninhibited. Anyone who needs a psychiatrist is bonkers, she thinks.

She could be right.

Wanda Liddell

/

Listen, Gorgeous

That was all the man from the gas company could say when he called on WANDA LIDDELL in her Camden Town flat. "Listen, gorgeous." Then he'd lose his voice because of breathing heavy, then he'd start again.

Wanda told him to stop larking about and to look at her cooker, and he thought, great hairpins, who wants to look at cookers anymore? He rang up his office, resigned and sent Wanda flowers. But it didn't make up for her cooker still being kaput.

Beautiful Britons No 240 - July 1975

Ruth Cavendish

/

Still In Great Shape

A few years ago, we met the most beautiful cashier we'd ever seen. All the other cashiers we'd met before her wore moustaches or blue suits, and looked at us over the tops of their glasses.

Many readers will remember her RUTH CAVENDISH of Glasgow, one of the more memorable of many memorable Scots.

How enchanted those readers will be to see that Ruth is still in great shape. She's a bonnier pin-up than ever. That's what comes of refusing to look like Twiggy. Ruth reckons that once a girl's grown curves, she's meant to keep them. Men get awfully grumpy if she gets as flat as a board.

Ruth has a smile as enchanting as her shape. Statistics plus vivacity make the most photogenic combination you could wish for. Remember, girls, that once you reduce yourselves to the shape of bean poles you go all glum and gloomy.

You don't really want to go around looking like that, do you?

Be like Ruth. Stay in great shape.

Spick and Span Extra No 35 - Summer 1970

Toni Townsend

/

Is This Arcadia ?

Arcadia, of course, is the place where all is joy and bliss, where everyone is beautiful, and the music is acceptable in the ears of all. They don’t have a Jimmy Young programme, mind you, but after you've been there a couple of hours you find you don't miss it a bit.

We thought we’d landed in Arcadia when our balloon came down in an uncharted area west of Poole in Dorset. Ensconced in a woodland glade and bedecked in filmy drapery was (we thought) the Queen of Arcadia herself. However, after she’d put her flute down, we found she was a Bournemouth housewife. Her name was TONI TOWNSEND but as far as we were concerned, she was better in our viewfinder than any Queen of Arcadia and her vitalistics of 37 - 23 - 37 proved it.

Helena McGuire

/

A Bird Afloat

When it comes to making the most of the Thames tributary just around the corner from where she lives, HELENA McGUIRE has just the right connection. In the shape of a lovely feller who owns a motor launch.

Mini-clad Helena looks enchanting on anything that floats, whether it's a launch, a punt or a barge. Her idea of bliss is that which comes from boats and waterways, plus a lovely feller who knows what to do if anything goes wrong.

There was one guy who proved a bit of a disaster, though. When the engine conked out one day he shouted, "Women and children first!" And threw her overboard. It wasn't the most exhilarating experience of her life, and Helena crossed him off her list of desirable boat owners.

Nicola Taylor

/

Wizard Winger

Soccer club managers who are dead worried about the lack of skills in their teams could do themselves a favour by watching the way NICOLA TAYLOR can manipulate a ball.

Supple, graceful and eye- catchingly gifted, Nicola is a wizard winger and can make an opposing 4-4-2 formation look like a lot of stranded bits and pieces.

But she's not for transfer, however. Her husband won't let her go. He likes to keep her gifts at home. They play in their garden every Saturday, and Nicola usually wins by 42-nil.

Kay De Lisle

/

Time Off From The Kitchen

It was a nice afternoon down in Dorset, so housewife KAY DE LISLE took time off from the kitchen to have a ramble around the countryside. She lost her skirt en route, it got hooked off by a clumsy-horned cow, and Kay was too sort of allergic to ask for it back.

Farmer Bulrush came along and Kay blushingly told him that one of his cows was responsible for her being in her knicks. "Ah, that be Daisy," he said, "her's a larky old dear.

Doan 'ee worry none, me darling, ain't seen a prettier pair o' knicks in years."

"Oh, you are awful," said Kay, "but ever so nice."

Beautiful Britons No 240 - July 1975

Donna Sharp

/

I Will See You In My Wig

Pop fan DONNA SHARP of Coventry in Warwickshire has just invested in a quite lovely wig. They're all wearing them. Donna isn't wearing hers in this pic, she's just having a chat with one of her boyfriends.

One? How many has she got, then?

Scores. She happens to be a smasher and there's safety in numbers.

"See you later, Jimmy," she said, "in my wig."

"I'm not wearing any wig of yours," said Jimmy.

"Watch it, comical," said Donna, "or you won’t see me at all."

Well, when he did see her Jimmy said, "Great galloping steamboats, you're groovy, baby, you've got 'em all licked."

We don't know what size Donna's wig is but Donna herself measures 36-23-36. That's what they call the makings of an even disposition. Anyone who differs considerably from this and measures something like 30- 30-37 can resign themselves to the fact that they've slipped.

Spick and Span Extra No 35 - Summer 1970

Melanie Davies

/

One Of The Serious Kind

A lot of you read all sorts of things about students and what they get up to and why they kick around, but you don't read so much about students who just get on with it.

One of the serious kind when it comes to applying herself to her studies is MELANIE DAVIES of Southampton. She’s really getting down to it at her university, but because it’s only the upset kind who get their names in the papers, we thought we’d do something about giving Melanie a mention.

Of course, in the first place she’s a very good looking student, and in the second place she makes the cutest pin-up girl. She’s lovely and symmetrical. 36"-24'-36'.

And she’s eighteen years old and that’s a vital age in anyone's life.

Carole-Anne Blake

/

I'll Catch You Up

They were panting along down the grassy track, their spiked shoes picking up every leaf until their soles were absolutely clogged with the stuff.

It was one of those exhausting cross-country events which only fanatics go in for, and Prideaux senior was leading the field, with Biffkins panting behind him.

Suddenly Prideaux senior gave up. He stopped dead. Biffkins panted by him, breasting the upward slope that led out of the wood into a field full of chewing cows.

"It’s all right, Biffkins,” said Prideaux, “I’ll catch you up.”

Crafty devil. He didn’t say a word to Biffkins that he’d seen a gorgeous blonde perilously near some barbed wire, and poor old Biffkins just panted on and never knew what he’d missed.

What had he missed?

A corker. CAROLE-ANNE BLAKE is a London model with lovely shape and a winsome twinkle. Prideaux senior introduced himself and said, “Just thought I’d tell you about the barbed wire.”

“Oh thanks,” said Carole-Anne, “but I know about it.”

Still, she thought, he was an awfully decent young feller to point it out to her and they had a long chat about wildflowers, and Prideaux said he collected stamps as well.

Good old Prideaux senior.

Karen Burch

/

Dizzy Mini

Down at Joe's there's a gorgeous thermostatic blonde who drives them all dizzy.

Thermostatic in this context means this gorgeous blonde remains in control and makes sure you don't boil over, mate.

Name? KAREN BURCH.

Occupation? Secretary at Joe's, the turf accountant's shop.

Hobby? Collecting money—what else?

Ambition? To marry a millionaire.

Age? Twenty-three.

Inches? 36-24-36.

Verdict? Declared the best bet Joe ever took on as a secretary, because she's not only competent, she's decorative and adorable.

In her horizontally striped mini, you can see why Karen drives them all dizzy.

Spick and Span Extra No 35 - Summer 1970