Sandra Morrell

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The Psychiatrist

Harry thought anybody who couldn't sort out his own problems but had to take them to a psychiatrist needed to have his head examined. His friend Oliver said that was the same thing, to which Harry replied it was all a lot of half-baked propaganda put about by blokes who had to make a living at it.

And then he met SANDRA MORRELL at a garden party, where there were lots of homemade cakes on view and a lot of home-made wine-tasting going on. Harry had tested them all by the time he bumped into Sandra, who was there in her official capacity as the garden party beauty queen or something equally exotic and ravishing.

Harry almost fell down. What a doll, he thought. He took her hand and pressed unsolicited kisses on it. Then he looked into her eyes and murmured, "Come and try my cherry tart, I made it myself." "Pardon me," said Sandra," but I never eat cherry tart with men who've had too much elderberry wine."

Harry was distraught. He went to see a psychiatrist next day to try and find out why elderberry wine made him so unattractive to women.

And after six visits, all at ten guineas a time, the psychiatrist told him it was because too much elderberry wine made him lurch sideways.

Joanann Marshall

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Mini Trend

It’s not only the teenage girls who love the mini fashions, you know. Grown-up girls like housewife JOANANN MARSHALL love them too, and what’s more, look absolutely gorgeous in them.

Naturally, you need to have peekaboo legs.

You also need a kind of off-beat detachment to enable you to ignore the wolf whistles.

Joanann is a Lancashire girl and as is well-known, the Lancashire males whistle louder than any. But at least they don’t go in for all that pinching and nipping. You have to go all the way to Rome for that.

Imagine having to go all the way to Rome to get pinched. Well, some like it.

Don’t try pinching Joanann. You'll get socked. She bruises easily She's very fond of art by the way. She doesn’t spend all her time going out and shopping for vegetables. You can still make the most of life.

Some men are lucky. One of them was very lucky. He married her and helps her with her mini shopping. He not only knows what Joanann likes, he knows what he likes too.

Avril Manders

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That’s Life

What do you say when you go out to buy a new hotplate for your kitchen and come back with a new set of glamorous lingerie instead?

That's life. What else can you say? It was what AVRIL MANDERS said, and personally we think Avril in a new set of glamour pants and all that looks a lot more peachy than a hotplate, new or otherwise.

When you live in an apartment and do your own cooking, you need a hotplate or a gas ring or something to cook the eggs on, but it's not a must. You can always go out and eat. Especially if you've got lots of generous boyfriends, only too delighted to stand you some hot fish and chips.

Avril likes a regular meal. It keeps her in shape, like.

Gillian Yates

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Flower Power

Working in a London florists, GILLIAN YATES represents 1975 flower power at its most irresistible.

It's easy to walk into her shop to buy a modest bouquet for your girlfriend, and it's even easier to stay there talking about hothouse carnations, the artistic delights of flower arrangement and what an exquisite arrangement it would be if Gillian shared a bus ride with you on Sundays.

But it's not so easy to ignore the biffs in the back you get from the waiting customers. Try to grin and bear it, Fred.

Diana Reed

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Unusual

Yes, okay, we know DIANA REED is shaped in the conventional but entrancing way of all glamorous girls. We know her statistics of 37-24-36 are delightful but not unusual. What is unusual is Diana’s chief outdoor interest. It isn’t muscular beach men, it’s landscape gardening.

It's what?

Yes, we know what you mean.

Annette French

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Hello Again

One girl who comes and goes as her job takes her here, there and elsewhere is ANNETTE FRENCH.

Annette was one of the first of the many recent Scottish models who’ve been featured in our magazines and it’s no effort at all to photograph her again and again and again.

It’s different with elephants. When you’ve seen one elephant you’ve seen them all. And let’s face it, when you’ve photographed any elephant you’ve got an image there’s no need to multiply. A photograph of any elephant is as educative and as illuminating as a hundred photographs of a hundred elephants.

A hundred photographs of Annette represent a hundred different aspects of photogenic allure.

Girls are different in a way that elephants are not different.

It’s very pleasing to realise that.

Sally Randall

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Clearing up after Corky

Computer operator SALLY RANDALL has got lovely long hair and eye-catching statistics of 37-23-35.

She’s good at judo, expert at crossword puzzles and she scintillates on the dance floor. And when there’s a long-haired dog called Corky around she also has to be good at sweeping up the hairs he sheds over the carpet.

She’s more than good at this as you can see, she’s gorgeous.

Moira Orfei

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Cara Moira

That, as all of you who’ve been to Italy know, means Moira, me lovely, you’re dear to me tender eyes, so you are. If you’ve been to Italy enough or stayed over when you should have returned home, you may indeed have clapped your dazzled optics on lustrous MOIRA ORFEI, one of the bewitching beauties currently captivating the Italian film scene. Moira is so good on the eyes it hurts. Which is another way of saying, “Stop me, Bertie, what fragrant delectability—it made me mince pies feel like hot velvet.”

Joanne Martin

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Looking a Treat

There might be a tendency these days for many women to favour trouser suits around the house, and if there is then there's a definite tendency among many men to think rude things about trouser suit designers.

Trousers for women shouldn't go beyond peekaboo pants worn by those Eastern beauties who adorn sultans' palaces.

Thank goodness housewife JOANNE MARTIN still believes women look their most feminine in exquisite lingerie. Joanne herself looks a treat in black underwear. How lovely to come home to hot soup, treacle pudding and Joanne.

"Not, I hope, in that order," said Joanne.

No, of course not.

Jacqueline Blair

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Cover Girl

Vital statistics of a cover girl are 35"-23"-36", and the particular quality of a cover girl is just the natural one of projecting herself so decoratively that the eye cannot resist her. It all adds up to being as endearing to the optics as shorthand-typist JACQUELINE BLAIR. Steady as we go, we’ve come a long way without having actually fallen overboard once.

Mary Graham

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Daddy Long- legs

You must have heard of “Daddy Long- legs” turned into a very successful play and musical, but if you haven't heard of the feminine equivalent in the shape of MARY GRAHAM, then this is where we bring you up-to-date.

Mary not only has long legs; she also has lovely legs. Plus, a flashing smile and a cute walk which makes bus conductors—and others—whistle.

Mary, naturally, is proud of her long legs — what girl wouldn’t be? but will not commit herself about bus conductors. All she will say is that any bus conductor who likes her leggy walk enough to whistle is the kind of man who should certainly be a conductor in preference to a driver.

Drivers, says Mary—and others—are there to keep their eyes on the road, while conductors are only there to keep their eyes on their passengers. If they whistle after me when their bus passes (says Mary) who am I to decry their taste and discrimination?

Soulange Ferrier

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French Style

Very much the delicious Parisian is SOULANGE FERRIER.

Soulange spends her summers working as a chambermaid in a hotel at St. Tropez.

That's French style if you like. Nothing a motherly middle-aged chambermaid who wheezes a bit. Not on your French nelly, dearest. No, it has to be a girl who could also double for a sexy French film actress in one of those permissive Gallic epics which make you roll about in the aisles.

What a lovely Soulange.

How exquisite to have the bedclothes turned down by her at night. Ah well, it's nice to think about.

Michelle Dolan

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What a Sparkler

An absolute dolly of a girl is MICHELLE DOLAN, who lives in Bradford, Yorkshire. Goes around with sparks in her eyes, lighting up like the Aurora Borealis at ail the funny things of life.

She's nineteen, measures 37-21-34 and works as a window-dresser. That's kind of Creative. She also likes to do a spot of modelling in her spare time. That's kind of artistic. Well, it is to us. We asked her what her favourite hobby was.

“Boyfriends” said Michelle.

Lisa Casala

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Watch What Birdie ?

There was lush dolly LISA CASALA on one side of the camera and Willy Boodle on the other. And Lisa was telling him to watch the birdie.

Willy did. What a peach, he thought. Big brown eyes and all. He went quite faint and when his passport photograph was developed it looked like a dose-up of a fragile hop-picker who'd been at the malt.

Lisa lives in Dorset. She likes the occasional camerawork.

On either side of the lens she's a beaut.

Willy didn't think his passport photograph would pass. So, he made six more appointments.

"One should be enough if only you don't go all quivery," said Lisa.

"I hope you don't think I've got malaria," said Willy, "I just suffer from susceptibility."

"Fascinating," said Lisa as she ushered him out.

Faith Pattinson

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Dedicated Faith

There are large numbers of elephants roaming around places like India, which sometimes makes it a dicey business crossing a road. Elephants don’t observe road rules any more than motorists do in some places. You get an instinct for avoiding action in respect of vehicular traffic, however, which enables you to survive the unpredictability of drivers. But it's different when you’re up against elephants.

Elephants seem dedicated to the pleasure of steaming ahead, irrespective of who's in the way. Once they've got their trunks down and their legs working on all systems go, their dedication to a straight line is heart-stopping. Talking about heart-stopping, we know a girl who makes ours go boompety-boomp, and she's dedicated too. Her straight line of dedication is that which leads to where she wants to go as a straight actress—the top. Her name is FAITH PATTINSON, she’s had stage parts and film parts, she lives in London and we have a feeling about her that we’ve never had about elephants. We have a feeling that elephants are just a load of crash-bang-wallop and that Faith is quite different.